Wow I haven't been on this thing in like two years. [Saturday, December 29th, 2007 @ 10:55 pm] [ mood | depressed ] [ music | Grateful Dead - Casey Jones ] What to say in the past two years?? Number one: DO NOT fall into depression over ANYTHING. It's not worth it. Number two: Don't take Ritalin. Number three: Don't do drugs. YOU WILL get caught. It's only a matter of time. Possibly a life time. Those are all the tips. Buuuut recently how have a been? You tell me. Can't figure it out? OK I'll tell you: shitty. Life sucks. But then you die. Right? Friends are strangely walking out of my life. And I honestly don't know why. Well I do know why but I just can't find the reasoning. Vershten: To anyone who knows what that means, use it. I just wish things would go back to the way they used to be. I want the sugar-coating back. I miss Ryan... a lot. I feel like he goes out of his way to ignore me. Even if thats not true it really sucks. And what also sucks is that I'm almost possitive he hasn't thought twice about me in about a month. I fucked it up. Once again. My life story. This one hurts though. I wish I knew earlier how much it affected him what I was doing. I guess I should of told him what he was doing earlier too then. Why am I still dwelling on this?? I'm pathetic. Closing Note? THANK GOD I'M GRADUATING THIS YEAR Now what am I going to do with my life? ( 2 ) ( Comment )

[Friday, January 19th, 2007 @ 11:49 pm] [ mood | crushed ] and your whole world starts to crumble when you finally realize, you have absolutely no one to talk to. i just want my best friend back. ( 1 ) ( Comment )

[Thursday, June 1st, 2006 @ 9:05 am] [ music | straylight run you idiots ] looking back at some old entries.. and i was in this class listening to straylight run. i love straylight run. and we're listening to them again in the same class but this time.. its at the end of the year, not the beginning. wtf im having the biggest deja vu ever right now. and it doesnt even have to do with straylight run. ( 1 ) ( Comment )

[Friday, March 3rd, 2006 @ 8:11 am] Lover lover let’s pretend Were born as innocents Cast into the world With apple eyes To wish wish dangerous My dear delirious To try and leave The rest of us behind ( Comment )

[Wednesday, October 5th, 2005 @ 8:50 am] let me tell you guy's some stuff. i'll start with this Leave your name and 1. I'll respond with something random about you. 2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you. 3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in. 4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me. 5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you. 6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of. 7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you. 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST i really cannot resist those things at all. uhm im at school and i feel lame because since im done with my work, i spend all my time on myspace and livejournal sad part is, i was done with my work before the hour even started erica's is my favorite place in the world i really miss rachael everson a lot... more than a lot we were just listening to good music i think someone who hated me is going to talk to me again homecoming is this weekend maybe i'll go there's what is on my mind right now. yeah do that thing up there. please. whoever's cd this is, i love them straylight runnnn ( 23 ) ( Comment )

[Monday, September 19th, 2005 @ 8:03 am] hey everyone you should buy a kitten from erica and i they are the cutest things ever and i'll have pictures later they're $5 each BUY THEM!!!!! PLEASE BUY THEM!!!!!!!! ( 11 ) ( Comment )

[Wednesday, August 24th, 2005 @ 11:46 pm] HI MOM!!!!! IT'S 11:48 PM AND I'M GETTING OFF THE COMPUTER NOW!     BYE! ( 5 ) ( Comment )

CHRISTINA!!!!! [Thursday, August 18th, 2005 @ 2:25 pm] [ mood | sad ] [ music | vertical horizon ] He's everything you want He's everything you need He's everything inside of you That you wish you could be He says all the right things At exactly the right time But he means nothing to you And you don't know why i love this girl everyone wish christina a happy 18 ( 6 ) ( Comment )

[Monday, August 15th, 2005 @ 10:43 pm] [ mood | ...OMFG LAGUNA BEACH! ] [ music | OMFG LAGUNA BEACH ] ok so omfg! LAGUNA BEACH PARTY NEXT WEEK AT MY HOUSE WITH ME AND SAM! SAM GETS 3 FRIENDS AND SO DO I! SLEEPOVER! NO BOYS ALLOWED! ahh haha i love being so 2nd grade. OMGZ SRSLY CHECK THESE GUYS OUT THEY ARE CUTE BOYS WHO ARE IN A BAND TOGETHER!!! www.myspace.com/senorasenora SRSLY ERYBODY CHECK THUM OUTTTTTTTTTT! ( 8 ) ( Comment )

[Sunday, July 31st, 2005 @ 10:43 pm] [ mood | jealous ] [ music | the transplants ] WARPED TOUR '05 WAS AMAZING! too bad we left really early and didn't get to see some awesome bands next year will be better, we'll be able to drive. ( 12 ) ( Comment )

[Friday, July 29th, 2005 @ 11:50 pm] its good to be home. ( 7 ) ( Comment )

[Wednesday, July 27th, 2005 @ 11:56 pm] [ mood | lazy ] [ music | gardenstate ] so i had to go to the bathroom and no one was downstairs so i decided to go with the door open. then my cousin came downstairs. and he saw me. awwww mannnnnnnn. ( 26 ) ( Comment )

[Tuesday, July 26th, 2005 @ 9:42 pm] [ mood | depressed ] [ music | snow patrol run ] i have a lot to look forward to but yet i'm not looking forward to it. let's see here erica just came over my aunt's for about 4 days. she left and now i'm lonely. sounds stupid, but whatever. i'm leaving this house on friday. i'm tremendously excited. erica and i worked out that me her rachael and courtney are all going to go to summerfling on saturday. hopefully i don't screw up anymore friday night so i can go. sunday warped tour. and monday i start volleyball camp. stupid enough i'm the most excited about volleyball camp then any other. i'm so undecided first i hate it and never want to do it again and then i can't wait to start it up again. pfft. my mom calle me around 8 and said she passed little caesars and saw rachael standing out there with her sign at her 'job'. that sounds weird. and then it hit me. i miss rachael tremendously. and i really can't wait to see her saturday. hope she can go, actually. if not sunday. hmmmmm let's see here what else, oh yeah. i'm extremely jealous of erica. we've expanded our friendship on making fun of fatasses. aw man... i'm fat... ooohhh. i haven't said that in about 3 hours. i need to go home. and sleep in my own bed. kick my sister out of her my room. my mom told me she cleaned up my room and organized it and everything, and then christina moved up and trashed it up once again. there's something about my room (or my bed) that's really cozy and attracts everyone. that's sounds sexual, but it's not. august 16-sin city comes out on dvd. i need to stop basing my life around movies. hopefully mom isn't still mad. i appologized. said i was going to put it back, which iwas. she seemed to believe me. i hope she can trust me again. I really need to see Elizabeth Wall before the end of the summer or i think i might go insane. i need a boyfriend ( 6 ) ( Comment )

[Monday, July 25th, 2005 @ 1:50 am] [ mood | fat ] why? because your a fatass? i love erica <3 ( 4 ) ( Comment )

[Saturday, July 23rd, 2005 @ 10:23 pm] ( 4 ) ( Comment )

[Friday, July 22nd, 2005 @ 3:51 pm] [ mood | liz =( ] i need to go back to North Carolina REALLY bad. i miss it terribly. i got along with everybody which was odd. i made friends with people that i hated. AND PLUS there's an extra special person in north carolina that i'm dying to see. Liz i can't wait till you turn 18. and when you turn 18 you WILL move back to michigan. either that or i'll just move to North Carolina with you. i miss youuu. ( 2 ) ( Comment )

[Wednesday, July 20th, 2005 @ 8:07 pm] ok so Nate tagged me to do this thing that's getting me worried as hell thinking about all this stuff. apparently i have to think about all the things i won't ever accomplish and will always regret. depressing. DAMN YOU NATE! 1. getting into a fucking college. my mom bitches to me about my grades and she tells me that if i don't raise my GPA then no college will accept me and that freaks me out. my sister bitches about my grades even more. fuck she's made me cry before. but they're all right. i need to get into a college. a good one at that. 2. moving out to california. i want to move there so bad. i need to move there. i need to get into a good college out there. but there's no way i'm going to have enough money to move out there within like the next 5 years or so. i'm flat out broke and probably always will be. 3. hmmm here's a weird and very unsuccessful goal----being famous. i want to be in the movie business really bad. but i know it's not going to happen. i've tried to make it work, but nothing good at all. that's all i'll say for this one. 4. i don't really know what it's called. it's probably like a costume designer or soemthing. but i want to design the clothes that all the models wear when they walk down a runway... anywhere. have my own clothes line. that is extremely expensive and top of the line. (kind of stuff that only celebrities buy) sounds kind of gay but that's what i want. 5. married with kids. i've barely had any relationships and they've all sucked. i can tell i'm not going to be a very good mom. but i hope i'm decent and i hope my kids actually like me. i hope i have kids. i'm scared that i'm never going to get married. it always seems like if i were to be in a relationship and actually think about marrying the guy. he'd use me. cheat on me. abuse me. and whatnot. i'm always scared that's going to happen. the being used and cheated on part even scares me to get a boyfriend. now i have a whole lotta stuff i have to work on. and it kind of excites me. thanks again, Nate. let's here who do i want to tag.... fogtom, wakenbetterdayz, emotechno_agogo, secuutus, glassgargoyle, alostforever, annnddd fad3dxsmilesx AND FLY_THISFOR_ME ahhh hahaha have fun guys =) ( 10 ) ( Comment )

[Monday, July 11th, 2005 @ 11:19 am] [ mood | awake ] [ music | weezer ] i miss dance a lot. i think LIZ and NICOLE need to come over and DANCE with ME. ( 6 ) ( Comment )

[Wednesday, June 1st, 2005 @ 12:59 am] [ mood | homework ] [ music | ......... ] This is the project Courtney and I have worked on for a total of 8 hours and 20 minutes. piece of crap it is. it works sometimes. as long as mr. fuzzie and mr. crapy metal fucking cooperate. haha... it is 1:07 am and i am still doing homework. and i started at 3 pm. isn't that pathetic? ( 9 ) ( Comment )

[Monday, May 30th, 2005 @ 11:16 pm] [ mood | bored ] [ music | hawthorne heights ] i wanted to write a lot but now i just can't and won't and don't want to... so i'm going to sum it up.... my grades HAVE to be better next year, no slacking off, wouldn't it be nice to have colleges calling you offering you full scholarships if you go to their college? yeah that would be nice, i wish that could happen to me... but considering i fucked up my freshmen year so badly... what am i going to do when my sister moves out? i have until august 24, better make the best of it. if i can, i'm moving to california with either erica or rachael if they want to. my two closest friends that i could stand to live with. i talked to my uncle about moving out there, he gave me lots of tips/pointers/suggestions/etc... i didn't really listen because i had no idea what he was talking about. but if this possiblity starts to come closer and closer to a maybe, or even a yes... i'm going to talk to him more... this weekend wasn't the best i can tell you that. anyone go to the 89x birthday bash, if they did tell me about it because i want to know how it was. ( Comment )

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